How Traveling/Backpacking Can Boost Your Social Skills

Many people who used to be socially clueless and then got over it can trace a lot of their improvement back to a few key choices they made. For me one of these was deciding to go traveling. I got so much practice working on my people skills there that I wasn't the same person when I came back.

A few years ago I spent about a year backpacking around Australia. Now to anyone who's done it, 'backpacking' is a euphemism for 'staying at one hostel after another on a well-worn tourist path and partying a lot with other foreigners'. If I had gone to Europe or SouthEast Asia I probably would have had a similar time. North America can be fun too, but I've heard the hostel system isn't as built up over here. It wasn't the most rugged or original travel experience but it was a blast.

I went after I had finished university. My goal was mainly to have a fun year away from reality, go to a country I always wanted to visit, and party a lot. By the time I was done with college I was in better shape socially than I was at the end of high-school but my people skills were still below par in a lot of ways. By the time I got home they were much better. Not a bad bonus for something I would have done anyways.

Obviously traveling is very fun. Everyone knows it broadens your horizons and makes you a better person. If you're young and not tied down with responsibilities you should go for just those reasons. But besides from that, here are some reasons to go in keeping with the theme of this site.

Backpacking is an extremely social experience. It's pretty hard for it not to boost your social skills

Upon arriving in a new city you can go around and see most of the touristy sights after a few days. In a small town you can see everything in an afternoon. Seeing a bunch of buildings, exhibits, or scenery gets old surprisingly quickly and rings hollow if you do it alone. You soon realize that most of the fun comes from the people you meet and the experiences you have with them.

Backpackers stay in hostels. Hostels are full of other travelers. Everyone is a stranger and is eager to meet new people. It's really easy to make friends and meet people to hang around with. If you don't try and meet anyone you get bored and lonely very quickly. Once you've made some friends you get to hang around them until you or they move on to the next place. Sometimes this is a few days, sometimes it's few weeks. Sometimes you travel with them for a while. Your relationships with people tend to be shorter but more intense compared to back home. Once you arrive at the next place the process starts over again.

You'll meet a ton of people, mostly at your hostel. You'll meet them in your shared room. You'll meet them in the T.V. room. You'll meet them by the pool. You'll meet them in the kitchen. I'll generalize and say that the people who go backpacking tend to be more fun, interesting, and outgoing then your average person... or maybe the circumstances just bring those traits out of everyone. You run into the odd weirdo but mostly everyone you meet is pretty cool and worth knowing.

Also, the people you meet are less intimidating than the ones at home because you tend to see them as non-threatening, positive stereotypes. When you see someone you tend to think, "Oh! A Swede! Cool! Swedes are fun and laid back. I want to talk to him!" At home you're more likely to size someone up first and come up with reasons why you wouldn't get along with them or they wouldn't want to talk to you. The people you meet while traveling don't carry the baggage that the ones from your own area do.

So where does this all lead for someone whose people skills could use some improvement? Well...

You're put into a situation where you're pretty much forced to be outgoing and meet new people (but it's easy to do so).
You get practice in talking to lots of people.
You get to meet people from lots of different countries.
You get practice in making friends.
You get practice in hanging around people one-on-one and in groups.
You get to meet a ton of people from the opposite sex too.
The people you meet are all pretty cool and you're bound to pick up some good traits from them.
You learn to do all this quickly.
You're just spending tons of time around people, period.

Tips for meeting people while you're backpacking

The magic conversation starting sentence is "Where are you from?".

To get a group of people together to go out with the magic sentence is, "We're going to ____, want to come?".

If you have nothing to do the phrase to say is, "You guys are going to _____? Mind if I come along?"

Some other things to say are:

"How long have you been in ____?"
"Where were you before you came here?"
"Have you been to ____ yet?"

Also, you're going to hear the same questions and comments about your country over and over so it helps to have some interesting/witty things to say when the topic comes up.

Traveling makes you a cooler, more interesting person

First, just the fact that you've gone traveling adds a little something to the way people see you. When I got home from Australia I knew it was impressive on some level but honestly didn't think it was that big a deal. It's a pretty standard trip for younger people to go on where I come from. But when I started talking to people when I got back they were often more impressed than I thought they would be. Many people haven't been traveling so the fact that you've been able to do it earns you respect in their eyes. People are also really curious if you've gone somewhere they've always wanted to go.

You also come back with many legitimately interesting stories, experiences, and little tidbits of information. You're a different person from when you left. Your conversations are naturally more engaging. You have more to say and you look at things a little differently, and so on and so on.

You can overdo it of course. You don't want to be that guy who starts every sentence with "When I was in..." or who still talks about the trip he took five years after it happened.

Depending on where you go there are certain things you have to do just for the points they'll get you back home. If you go to Australia you must learn to surf. When I got home a few times I'd be chatting to a girl and I'd mention that I just got back from Australia. You could see the wheels turning for a second before their eyes lit up and they asked "Oooh! Did you surf?!?" I wish I had. I'm not sure what the equivalent experiences are for other places. I'd say if you go to Europe you should probably swing by Amsterdam. I know I'd want to hear some stories about it. Go a full moon party if you go to Thailand.

Backpacking is a great preparation for college life

Going off to university and living in residence has a lot of things in common with traveling around and staying in hostels. If you want to give yourself a head start on the whole college experience go traveling first.

Here are some things the two share:

You're away from home fending for yourself...but you can't help but feel like you're just staying at some glorified camp.
You have to do little things for yourself like buy groceries, pay bills, and arrange your transportation.
You're in an environment with tons of other young people who don't know anyone and who want to make new friends quickly.
You have to share your room with one or more strangers (and their various annoying habits).
You have to use a communal bathroom.
You have to get the feel for the new town or city you're in.
You have to do your laundry in coin-operated machines.
If you're making your own food you have to cook in a communal kitchen.
You don't have a lot of money and have to be careful with your spending...but at the same time you can always count on your parents for help.
If you meet someone who wants to hookup with you, you don't have anywhere private to go.
You get to stay up late having profound conversations about life with your new friends.
You get to go out to corny bars in giant packs with all your new friends.

I'll say it again, the best reason to go traveling is because it's really fun. One week in another city getting in adventures with fellow travelers is about equal to a month in the real world. There are all kinds of other reasons to go that I haven't even touched on. The boost you could get in your social skills is just a happy side-effect.